Ohana

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Time to move on

I want this to be the last day of hurt. From now on, I look forward to a bright and happy future. I want to... no... I have to be willing to move on. I have to remember that we are stronger when we are together then when we are apart. I have to put my hurt aside not just for her, but for me. Dwelling on pain does not help. She wants to move on. So do I. This will just be a brief hiccup in our relationship, but we can make it stronger. To anybody who reads this, I love you.
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Clean Slates and Putting The Past Behind Ya.

I've made it my goal this week to put everything in the past and to give everyone, including myself, a clean slate. I'm trying not to talk about things that are in the past as much. Instead I am focusing on what is happening to me right now. I am trying to remember that there is goodness all around me, that I am fortunate to have what I have been given, and that I can decide the course of my own happiness. Part of that is being there for my companion. I know when she's upset. I know when things are bothering her. I know when she's stressed out, and right now she needs normalcy. At the same time, I want her to know that she can talk to me whenever anything is bothering her, and I do mean anything. We can only get through our problems if we work with each other instead of against of each other, which I think I am guilty of doing. So hopefully, we can give each other the space, the time, and the clean slates that we both need. I know we can, and we are stronger for i...
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I am trying, and we will make it through

This has been one of the worst weeks of my life. I just need to vent because this is too much, and if I don't let it out it just eats away at me. We had gotten back to a point in our relationship where we were playing again. Using each other to escape. And then... the shoe dropped. I'm shaken, I'm shocked, I'm shattered. I'm hurt. It's hard to recover from something like this. So much of my confidence is tied into my relationship, and when the relationship starts to have problems my first thoughts are "What am I not doing right?" It's hard to rebuild trust when something like this happens. It takes a lot out of you just to put yourself out there again. However, you have to be willing to trust again. You have to remind yourself that "she is still here." No matter how much you are hurting, you have to remember that what happened was in the past even if the past were mere weeks before. I felt like that happy spot that I had just re...
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